Homeschooling after three weeks...

Eighteen months ago I had an unusual urge to learn about homeschooling. I read a great book called The Well-Trained Mind that gave me the confidence that I could pull it off. I had reservations, though. How would I juggle three kids at once? While focusing on one wouldn't the others run off? What about personality conflicts? Would I go crazy never having a break from the kids? A year in France with both Geoff and me available to teach seemed the perfect opportunity to give it a go. We wanted to maximize family time, were anxious to keep friends and culture at bay, liked the flexibility, and didn't want the time commitments associated with a school community. We figured the worst thing that could happen is it wouldn't work for us, and we could always put them in a local school.

We're in our third week. The first week or two were hectic. Preparation time was high since every day was a first. Setting expectations with the girls took planning and persistence and, as with any kids used to a lazy summer lifestyle, it took some time for them to willingly sit still and listen for any period of time. I tried my best to roll with the rough waves. Preparation time now takes me a few hours once a week, and about 20 minutes daily, on average. We chose a curriculum-in-a-box through Sonlight that is laid out for us day-by-day, and is very simple to teach. There are all sorts of things we could add to embellish the topics, but we choose to simplify as much as we can.

The unexpected
Kids have different moods and energy levels everyday like we do. I used to send my kids off to school figuring that once they got there they'd jump in and have a great day, even if they spent the morning whining. I'm beginning to realize that in a classroom children (I'm generalizing) can "hide" when not in the mood to be there. They can tune out when the teacher is talking to the crowded classroom. Hyper energy is subdued when not appropriate because of peer pressure, or to please the teacher. Frustration about not understanding something being taught is held inside in fear they are the only ones not getting it. The daily changes in the girl's ability to focus, show respect, or pick up information has been a surprise. Whether it is caused by tiredness, diet, needing a break or the myriad of other reasons, the daily changes exist. At first I was a little frustrated when they didn't show consistent zeal for knowledge. Now I am grateful to see a little bit into their daily rhythms. I have more compassion, and more patience...(at least some of the time!)

Individual learning styles were expected, and they are evident! What takes me by surprise is the continual revelation of the girl's unique strengths and weaknesses in learning. What is a piece of cake for one is a chore for the other. Where one begs to begin, the other stalls. I didn't imagine how obvious this would be. I wonder that this child or that child really doesn't get something, and it seems like they should more easily. Then begins the riddle of why a concept or skill is so difficult for this child to grasp? Or, on the flip side, we marvel that certain connections happen so easily and quickly, or how they soar beyond the grade materials in a particular unit, or topic. These past years I thought I had a general sense of strenths and weaknesses in the girls. I had no real idea, just broad assumptions like, "math might take a little extra drilling." I feel much more tuned in to their individual brains.

I expected it to be a lot of work, like I expected motherhood to be busy when I was pregnant with my first child. Then reality hits. How do I so grossly underestimate? I am dressed and going non-stop from 7:00AM to 10:00PM between homeschooling, homekeeping and mothering. By the end of the day I am exhausted! Our homeschooling hours aren't stressful (with the exception of occasional conflicts between student and teacher), but physically, mentally and emotional demanding for several hours straight. It is a condensed, focused energy on the girls as I help them learn, and love doing it. Every morning takes a gearing up; a little locker room pre-game pep talk that the day can and will be as great as I intend it to be. Continuing on this analogy, I don't always feel like I've won the game. Some days I feel like I was too rigid; too focused on getting through the material. Other days I lay in bed at night and marvel that I witnessed a mental breakthrough in one of the girls, or that everything seemed to "work".

We're organized enough (after a few weeks of trial and error) to keep all the kids going at once. We've established rules and regulations that keep distraction to a minimum. That this isn't a daily concern is a welcome surprise.

The expected
As mentioned above, I often get caught up in getting through the material. My dad always encourages me to "Let go of the outcome". I interpret this to mean, have a plan and get started and then let go of how it turns out. Allow changes to take place. Don't hold on so tight to how it "should" turn out (according to who?!...me!) and allow the process to take it's own serendipitous course. For me flexibility is like living with my left hand, it isn't natural! I try to force things to end the way I want them to, when I want them to! It has been one of the greatest challenges of motherhood, as we all know children have their own ideas, and their own time frame! I knew this would be one of my greatest challenges when homeschooling, and I welcome it. I view each day as an opportunity to overcome this personal tendency.

I do go a little crazy not having a little more time for myself. One night last week I lay in bed considering our choice to homeschool the kids, and wondered if it would be a more restful year if they were in school all day? Is it really worth all the work? We don't have to homeschool the girls. (I love agency. Several years ago I worked at eliminating the words "have to" from my vocabulary and it did wonders for me.) At that moment I remembered that I really do want this for our unique year in France. I want to take advantage of the time with the girls, and Geoff. I want to learn to put myself aside for a greater purpose. I'm getting a lot of practice...

I love preparing lessons, and I love teaching. I'm so excited about the things we're learning together. I love being right on top of what they learn. I love that we discuss a concept and then reinforce it again and again as we see it around us (i.e. condensation). I love that we're learning about the peoples of the earth and their different languages, currencies, traditions and religions, and they see it firsthand everywhere we go. I love having discussions about what we're learning at dinner. I love when we read something and they exclaim, "This is so interesting!" I love knowing what my girls do all day. I love that they have all afternoon to be kids, free as the wind. This is what I was most excited about, this gives my battery juice.

These are my own personal musings (imagine how much more I'll have to say after a year!?) Maybe Geoff will share his thoughts about our homeschooling experience at some point, too...