Insights from my notebook

Recently I thumbed through my small notebook where I keep notes, insights, lists, etc. I was double-checking to see if I have acted on all of the impressions I have received. I started this notebook last summer. Originally we planned to homeschool only the one year in France, but we didn't know how long we would be in Auburn, so it was easier to just keep on going as we had been before, and...it felt like the right thing for me to do. Back to my notebook, at the beginning it had all sorts of daily schedule drafts for the upcoming school year. There were lists of rules and expectations; discipline strategies; incentives; supply lists, and lists of what went well the year before, and what could have been better. Looking back, I was gearing up. I knew the battle ahead!

A woman in our ward here put us in contact with a very nice occupational therapist who works in local elementary schools. She came and gave me some helpful tips to keep the girls focused, and some exercises for some sensory integration issues. The tools were initially very comforting as I felt I had something to DO to keep thing in control. But it was like a band-aid. The concerns were still there, we were just trying to function around them.

In October, I wrote down some impressions received on the way to the General Relief Society broadcast. One was a gentle reprimand for wishing for a different "errand" (than home-educating my children). The other was the reliance I was giving to charts and tools to make school "work". I was clearly told to turn to the Lord.

It was true, I was working like a maniac trying to make school function as I thought it "should"...and I was wearing myself out, in frustration, in the process. I was fully relying on my own "arm of flesh". My intentions were all glorious, but I was going in the wrong direction. Looking back, that was when things began to change. My mind was opened up and my perspectives changed about all sorts of things.

Later that same month I was in the temple, prayerfully seeking what the Lord wanted me to do. I was looking at the beautiful mural in the endowment room, a gorgeous view of valleys, prairies, and mountains. A distinct feeling came to get the girls out into nature - explore, hike, fish, ride bikes, and do a lot of schooling outdoors.

At the time I was wondering exactly how to do that. But slowly I am understanding a little more of the significance of following that simple counsel.