Irony

Have I mentioned that this past winter was the coldest weather in 65 years? And now we are in the wettest spring anyone can remember? It seems that God loves to work through irony. Geoff dedicated his life to helping all of God's children have opportunities to succeed but in the process became so sick he couldn't do the very thing he felt inspired to do. Irony. Then, when moving to France seemed like the right thing to do we felt that it was going to be a place to dry out after 7 years in the Northwest. Instead it has been cold and rainy most of our time here. Let me make sure to clarify that we have had an incredible experience in France; a life changing experience...just in different ways that we expected. I would imagine that this irony happens in all of our lives at one time or another.

There is a truth in Buddhism that says something to the effect that Life is Pain but we only suffer because we have an expectation about how life should be. The difference between what life is and what we feel it should be is what causes the suffering. I love that. Geoff and I have talked a lot about it. I have a natural tendency to form pictures in my head - anything from how I would like my day to go, to what I would like my child to be like, to what the next phase in our life will look like. They are beautiful pictures, I assure you. Then I work like a maniac to make those pictures happen. Usually I feel frustrated and disappointed, and as the Buddhist truth would say, still full of desire for what life should be.

Personally, through the irony in our lives, I'm learning to let go of those perfect pictures (my parent's are cheering, I'm sure!) In many ways I feel like I'm living life with my left hand. But I'm learning to trust that our challenges in life have a purpose: to help us grow and become more God-like, and that as we submit to these challenges and rely on the Savior we don't have to feel any suffering. I am learning to accept that life is about pain (struggle; adversity)...that is the plan! Once I accept that truth, and allow the refining to take place, I actually don't feel any suffering at all. I feel joy as I trust in and receive help from the Savior. I feel peace despite the pain and the irony in our lives. I'm so grateful for such a personalized tutorial in learning this. This has been just part of my French experience. What a year!

Oh, and it does makes the rain the past four days feel more tolerable!